The Enigmatic “Beefy”

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Thanks to Spencer, I’ve finally gotten acquainted with the visage of Christine or Bonnie which is her real name. Inspired by this collection of strange and disturbing photos, I’ve decided to write a list. List-making is one of my favorite activities, especially when I’m suffering a severe mental breakdown. My psychoanalyst suggested it. Enjoy!

List of Things I Like

  • Bonnie’s dog.
  • The picture of Bonnie’s cousin Misty in front of a parking lot wearing sunglasses.
  • Hot Wheels toy cars.

List of Things I Don’t Like

  • Bonnie And Friend having lesbian sex in a shower.
  • Bonnie And Friend having lesbian sex in a bed.
  • Bonnie having buttsex with Male Friend With No Balls and/or Female Friend with Shiny Red Dildo.
  • Being generally surrounded by vaginas.
  • Oh look! Bonnie goes to church.
  • Bonnie’s large, bearded friend.
  • Is that a vagina?
  • Bonnie’s nipple piercings. Jesus.
  • Speaking of Jesus, doesn’t this nice girl go to church?

I’d blog more about something, anything, but my entrails crawled out of my body and hid behind something and I have to go find them.

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